That boy’s sense is few and far between visits.
This is a saying I can remember my Granddad using about a certain kid who hung around his house, making puppy dog eyes at my gorgeous Aunt Nina, for about nine years. This boy withstood the untold tortures of her older brothers, namely my father and his younger brothers, Bruce and Philip, just to chance a meeting with the ethereal Anita. Every practical joke that could be played was taken out on the kid, and he kept coming back for more. My Granddad would just shake his head and say, “That boy ain’t got good sense.”
I think of these sayings a lot when we’re out. I see and hear a lot of things that don’t make any sense at all, and seem like just plain bad ideas, no matter how they’re dressed up. The homemade billboard in Arkansas that suggests beating your kids with a cane pole is what Jesus wants is one that comes to mind readily. I’m fairly certain if you spend enough time reading billboards, not only does your IQ drop exponentially, your brain rots out and you involuntarily eat your own arm off.
OK, so maybe it’s not quite that bad, but there are some truly horrible ideas on billboards.
We were heading to Dallas, coming through Midland on the little commercial stretch. I was bored and staring out the window. Suddenly, a giant set of red breasts loomed overhead with an ominous message plastered beside 15-foot cleavage. “I CAN HELP YOU GET YOUR CDL IN THREE DAYS FOR $250.”
OK, this is a bad-idea trifecta. First: giant, billboard-sized boobies are a definite distraction, I don’t care who you are. The freakin’ Pope would take his eyes from the road to look at 30-foot boobs. I get it that the evil advertising overlords are counting on this, but it doesn’t make it a good idea. Second, get a CDL in three days? On what planet is this legal or sane? Third, I doubt this enormously endowed giantess is going to help you do anything other than make your wife talk ugly to you.
I had been mulling over the billboard for a few minutes before I asked George about it.
