Co-owners of an eight-truck fleet, Mike and Jane Connors share the challenges and rewards of running a business together and maintaining a marriage.
Jane Connors is a jack – make that jane – of all trades: trucker’s wife, homemaker, former driver, writer and manager of the eight-truck fleet she runs alongside her husband.
She is one of thousands of spouses of over-the-road truckers who face a special set of challenges because of their husband’s – or wife’s – demanding and time-consuming job.
A trucker’s spouse or significant other has to handle a mixed bag of problems and worries the average spouse rarely has to confront all at once – the trucker’s safety and fidelity, missing him while he’s gone, raising children with half of the parenting team gone half the time, supporting his dreams while sometimes sacrificing her own, and going it alone on the home issues most couples handle together.
But for all they must overcome, spouses often form the cornerstone of a trucker’s career – something he can build on and lean on; someone who will encourage him, help with business decisions and paperwork and – most importantly – lighten his mental and emotional load.
Stand by your partner
For a relationship to survive the days or weeks of separation, truckers’ spouses must give strong emotional support. An eTrucker.com poll of 554 drivers found that 24 percent of drivers feel their spouse’s emotional support is what helps them most in their trucking career.
Connors, who lives with her husband of 16 years, Mike, in the little town of Suwanee, Fla., says driver-spouse relationships often survive better when the trucker’s wife is in a supporting role. “Their life revolves around their husband,” she says. “In an area like this, trucking is the best job a man can get. It makes sense for her to support him and be there when he needs it. That’s a hard thing for a lot of women to do.
“It sounds like the Stepford wives, but in some ways it is like that,” Connors says. “And at the same time you have to be this independent woman. I don’t think you’ll find a lot of truckers’ wives who are real submissive. That’s a skill I had to learn. It didn’t come easy to have to set myself aside for him.”
